I'm back in Chicago, convoluted with strange weather patterns and too many decisions to make. It's a wet day, and there's a chilly white sky peeking through the window. I've been meaning to go to a capoeira batizado today and I will, (I was there most of the day yesterday and it was wonderful,) but too many thoughts/emails/pressing things (like computer keyboard buttons and jumpy jumpy thoughts) have kept me home for a bit. My favorite is of course working with a really good cup of coffee in my hand and anticipation that something lovely will happen just at the tip of this sentence.
I've been watching a few Meg Ryan movies lately to fantasize and smile about the "good life."
She makes me smile, has the appeal of a child and a woman in her innocent yet conniving expressions, and is one of the more joyful actresses you can watch on the silver or dusty laptop screen. I watched "Addicted to Love" and "Prelude to a Kiss," which are both very feel good and warming. Prelude to a Kiss is pretty strange of course, because Alec Baldwin ends up making out with an old man carrying the soul of Meg Ryan, but isn't that the fantasy - that it's her soul he loves best?
Anyway, I best pull on my sneakers and brave the wet pavement, lest Mestre Acordeon and crew finish off the day without me...too much fun, I have to say. Though I tried the berimbau for the first time yesterday and realized that my tiny child's hands are not exactly equipped for this instrument, "you just have to get used to it," said the man with giant man hands next to me.
Ah well! My raouls rock at least.
Sunday, September 25, 2011
Thursday, September 15, 2011
Manifest
Comfort. In your favorite wine. In your sister's smile. Comfort zone...I want to wrap myself inside of you, I want to venture forth into the world while wrapped in the sturdiest of coats...I want that love to cradle me while I cradle the rest.
I marvel at my life for it is a marvel. What can't I do? I can fly. I can read minds. I'm working on my x-ray vision and my time travel but I'm getting there.
I'm so crazy proud of my little sisters. They are all grown up (well mostly) and considering I've watched them grow and become since day one it feels like such a victory. They are shining, they are taking the world into their confident little hands and making what they wish of an existence that seems overly complicated most of the time.
I love drinking with my parents as if we're out on a date. Or just that we're really old and sophisticated. Or just that I've earned their respect at some point in the game. It makes me happy.
How on earth did I manage to work with such incredible people already? Have I earned it? It's been wonderful. Sometimes life does give back and you should just rejoice because you probably did something.
I marvel at my life for it is a marvel. What can't I do? I can fly. I can read minds. I'm working on my x-ray vision and my time travel but I'm getting there.
I'm so crazy proud of my little sisters. They are all grown up (well mostly) and considering I've watched them grow and become since day one it feels like such a victory. They are shining, they are taking the world into their confident little hands and making what they wish of an existence that seems overly complicated most of the time.
I love drinking with my parents as if we're out on a date. Or just that we're really old and sophisticated. Or just that I've earned their respect at some point in the game. It makes me happy.
How on earth did I manage to work with such incredible people already? Have I earned it? It's been wonderful. Sometimes life does give back and you should just rejoice because you probably did something.
Monday, September 12, 2011
Home is a set of plane tickets
mainly because I don't have one location that is the traditional concept of "home" for moi. And really, I'm lucky enough to be able to jet around all over the place and piece together the puzzle pieces that make me, geographically scattered as they are.
I found a dish towel hanging from my mother's oven that reads "Home is where my mom is." And really, home is where my loved ones are, it's true, therefore home are where they are. Home "are" there or maybe "is" like a spilled bottle of wine or juice that trickles into different crevices but is still part of the same whole. Maybe in measurement, home is more of a liquid, divided in fragments but part of a whole.
I returned to Porto Alegre, Brazil, for a brief spell and then was pretty thrilled, anxious even to get back to the US. I was eager to retrieve my past you see. It all started with a dear childhood friend's wedding in Boston, followed by travel to DC and Colorado with another dear childhood friend/distant relative from Israel. All of the East Coast travels convinced me that I should just move back to the American East Coast because Home...maybe there are places on this planet that make me feel especially like "me" and maybe quite a few of them are concentrated over there. There's just a whole lot of juice in those parts and now my mind is working on that idea, of a wonderful return, a homecoming to a place that I love. How sweet.
I found a dish towel hanging from my mother's oven that reads "Home is where my mom is." And really, home is where my loved ones are, it's true, therefore home are where they are. Home "are" there or maybe "is" like a spilled bottle of wine or juice that trickles into different crevices but is still part of the same whole. Maybe in measurement, home is more of a liquid, divided in fragments but part of a whole.
I returned to Porto Alegre, Brazil, for a brief spell and then was pretty thrilled, anxious even to get back to the US. I was eager to retrieve my past you see. It all started with a dear childhood friend's wedding in Boston, followed by travel to DC and Colorado with another dear childhood friend/distant relative from Israel. All of the East Coast travels convinced me that I should just move back to the American East Coast because Home...maybe there are places on this planet that make me feel especially like "me" and maybe quite a few of them are concentrated over there. There's just a whole lot of juice in those parts and now my mind is working on that idea, of a wonderful return, a homecoming to a place that I love. How sweet.
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